.Wednesday, February 28, 2007 ' 1:00 AM Y
Yesterday night got a fight with my mother again, this time she beats me. Same thing, scolded me for not having a job, nag and nag and nag, like a nagging machine. Really hates the word "
USELESS", and so i scolded back, ended up she raised her hands to beat me for scolded back. I have "REN" for very long already lo... Once i started to rebel, she cursed me that next time my child will treat me bad DOUBLE and i will get my retribution!!! I can't control myself anymore, so ended up scolding back. She's like a mad woman in front of me, started using her "claw" to scratch me till my hand bled a bit and the skin tore a bit, i can't let her continue, so i pushed her away, and she started accusing me for beating back, cursed me that i will be strucked by the thunder for beating mother. *SAD*
Then she wanna chase me out of home, called me to stay with Bee, and called him to support me. But she knew that both of us are still young, we dun have the capability to support ourself yet, but yet she used this type of sentence to prove that she got the power and i must still depend on her...
I HATE myself, Hate myself for not having money with me, hate myself for being useless, need to get money from her.. If not all these wun happen..
And then she kept pusing the door, and wanted to shoo me to get out of the home, but luckily LI helped me to block the door from letting her in... And then she gave up.
Life is meaningless to me, having such mother...
Luckily i still have my second sister with me, without her support, think i will end my life...
Really thanks Li a lot.. Love u so muchh...
This morning, mother really din give me money to eat and also nv cook my dinner.. She really did wad she said yesterday...
And then Just now went to my aunty's house and complaint everything to her... And so glad that my aunty said that i shall come to her house to eat if my mum din give me to eat.
Love my sec aunt and uncle so much.. They are very kind person, consoled me and making me better... thks thks..
And while i was feeling depressed, my phone rang, saw a weird number, actually decides not to pick up one, but dunno why i still pick up to see who is that who called me so late. And then.... Is See Leng, my sec sch friend, she saw my blog and knew that i need job urgently, so she intro me to her working area to work as Admin, but then i have to send my resume first and have an interview from her boss~!!
Finally i see some light, although it may be 10% chance, but i shall try my best, and hope i could success this time..
Really thanks See Leng for giving some hopes when i am feeling real depressed...
I hope i can get this job!!!
Shen ar.. Jiu Jiu Wo Ba!!!! God please help me!!!!
